I already feel like I’m trapped in the middle of a game called Earth Must Die, one where the rules make no sense and I have zero control over how it’s all going to end. Perhaps that’s why I’m excited for the latest comedy adventure of the same name from Size Five Games, which has just announced that it’ll let you embark on a mission of planetary destruction later this month.
Earth Must Die wraps you in the silken robe of VValek Lizardtongue, a megalomaniacal alien nepo baby who has just inherited the kingdom of Tyrythia from his father. Unfortunately, he’s instantly lost control of his realm due to the invasion of robotic Terranoids that killed his father in the first instance. Naturally, Vvalek decides to take his frustration out on Earth, for reasons we’ll presumably discover while playing.
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Personally, I’d be interested in Earth Must Die with or without the cast, having enjoyed Size Five’s games since the Ben There, Dan That days. But I am curious to see how the added voice talent affects Earth Must Die’s prospects. Voice actors are having a real moment post-Baldur’s Gate 3, with numerous games soaring to success off the back of strong vocal performances.
Dispatch is the primary example here, having wrangled an incredible cast of Hollywood actors, streamers and members of Critical Role for its superhero narrative adventure. Domestic dating sim Date Everything also saw smaller, but still significant success, by letting you flirt with your favourite VO disguised as pieces of furniture. There’s British precedent here too, with 2024’s Thank Goodness You’re Here deploying the likes of Matt Berry and former games journalist Jon Blyth (who also features in Earth Must Die) to superb effect in its comedy slapformer.
All of this makes me confident that Earth Must Die will find its audience, provided the underlying game is as strong as the talent voicing it. The game launches on January 27, in less than two weeks’ time, so we don’t have long to wait to find out how it stacks up. If you can’t wait that long to play it, or just want to try it before investing in the full game, there’s also a demo available on Steam.
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