The games industry’s Tunguska event—that is Grand Theft Auto 6—is due out in a mere seven months, three weeks, and from what I can gather, every dev who isn’t Rockstar is anticipating it like regular people would anticipate the opening of the seventh seal.
But for you and me? A big videogame is coming! Isn’t that exciting? And to fuel your excitement, I can report that the GTA bloodhounds have been at it again. Prominent Rockstar truffle-snuffler Tez has dug up a bunch of URLs (via GamesRadar) that seem pretty darn likely to be tied to websites in the game’s fake internet. Brace yourself for the hilarious japes promised by:
- what-up.app
- rydeme.app
- buckme.app
- leonidagov.org
- brianandbradley.com
- hookers-galore.com
- wipeoutcornskin.com
- myboyhasacreepycorndog.com
These sites were all, says Tez, “registered on May 27 under Take-Two’s nameservers that seem to be VI-related.” In other words, they were all tied to nameservers—think of it like an internet telephone book, if you’re old enough to remember telephone books—tied to Take-Two.
Tez is correct. None of the sites are live yet, but they were all, at some point in the past, tied to nameservers like ns03.vandalay-industries.net and dns2.p05.nsone.net, according to a historical WhoIs lookup. Both those nameservers (and others attached to the sites listed above) are also tied to sites like rockstargames.com, so it’s clear they’re related to Take-Two. The mention of Leonida (GTA 6’s fictional home state) and What-up (a WhatsApp parody featured in earlier GTA 6 leaks) seal the deal, so far as I’m concerned.
Even more suspicious, the domains all coincidentally got moved to new nameservers without ties to Take-Two just as soon as people noticed them. As of an update yesterday, those sites are now tied to nameservers linked to a software company called Mark Monitor. It’s not definitive evidence of anything, I guess, but it sure seems like Take-Two is trying to hurriedly cover its tracks.
Which is a little silly, frankly. GTA 6 isn’t a secret, and these URLs don’t tell us much, so I don’t know exactly what Take-Two is trying to cover up by shifting them. Anyhow, let’s do some good, honest journalism and speculate baselessly about what all these websites are.
WhatUp.app: This one is GTA’s WhatsApp parody. Easy-peasy. We’ve seen it before.
RydeMe.app: This one’s Uber, right? Gonna guess it’s a means of fast-travelling about Vice City.
BuckMe.app: Some fans speculate this is some kind of OnlyFans parody, but I’m guessing it’s more like Venmo.
Leonidagov.org: Pretty simple. A website for the state government.
BrianAndBradley.com: Fans theorise this is a parody of Morgan & Morgan, a personal injury law firm.
Hookers-Galore.com: Tasteful. Also theorised to be an OnlyFans parody, though I suspect the people guessing it’s actually a fishing website are nearer the money.
WipeoutCornskin.com: Hell, buddy, your guess is as good as mine. Tied to a side quest, perhaps?
MyBoyHasACreepyCorndog.com: I don’t want to know.
Anyway, those of you worried/hopeful that GTA 6 was going to take a more delicate, sombre tone more in-line with Red Dead Redemption 2? Well, I guess this is evidence you needn’t worry/hope about that.
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